Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Getting what you want, part II

Today is part 14 of a 30 day commitment. To read about how I am blogging to change my life please read here first.

On July 30th put a post called "Getting what you want, what do you want?" This is a continuation of that post.

The motivational speakers make it sound so easy. Just decide what you want and work towards it. Do something! Take action! My problem is in figuring out what I want. There are some people that seem to know exactly what they want and will work relentlessly to get it.

Most of the people who I can put in this category seem to have gone through some sort of personal tragedy in order to form this clear vision and purpose. Think of John Walsh, the host of Americas Most Wanted. John was a successful businessman who built high end luxury hotels. In 1981 his 6 year old son Adam (his picture is above) was kidnapped and murdered. His new mission in life was to make sure he did whatever he could to prevent anybody else from going through the same tragedy. Do you think that he cared about how much money he made at that point? I seriously doubt it. He became focused on a larger role for his life. He found his purpose. What a terrible way to figure out what your purpose is.

So my thought is, why wait? Why do we have to wait until we have some sort of devastating event happen to us before we gain that type of clarity? Can we take ourselves so far out of our comfort zone as to create our own personal tragedy? Not literally create it, but use the power of your mind to envision what you would do with your life if something like that happened. You don't really need to loose a loved one to cancer to decide that you are going to dedicate your life to finding a vaccine. But you do need the passion and vision to be able to get through the countless failures it will take along the way to success. That relentless drive seems to be more defined in those people who actually have gone through it. So how can we get that kind of burning passion for our lives. How do we get that clarity to not care what anybody else in the world thinks and know that we are on the right path to success?

I wish that I could create that kind of vision for myself without the terrible loss. My vision for National Powersports became clear because of the emotional agony I went through working for my Dad. It helped me be clear on what I wanted to build and money didn't cloud the issue. I would have swept streets rather than have money at that point. As long as I didn't ever have to feel that way again I knew I'd be happy. So I built an environment around me with based on those thoughts.

Now I want to write a book, and even today I still don't have a clear vision on what it is going to be. That's frustrating. Even though I'm frustrated I am very happy that I am taking steps to move forward. That feels good. That actually reduces the stress in my life. I put a lot of stress on myself when I long for something that I can't seem to define.


Cris said...

Just wanted to say thanks for posting all this. Can't imagine what it's like. I wish I had known what you were going through back when you were in St. J and I wish I could have stayed tighter with you.

Look forward to more posts.



Nathan Sanel said...

I really appreciate you sending me this. I am sure that I have a diffrent perception of why our group of buddies went our own way than you do. It is nice to hear that you are doing well and that your reading the Blog. Please keep in touch!

Anonymous said...

This particular post resonates with me because from the outside people view me as successful. However, I have yet to find my passion in life and so for me, all the "success" is really just me making the best of what I can for now. I figure, when I do find my passion, I want to be in a position to make a fearless decision and so preparing for that now is all I can do.

I am fortunately (and unfortunately) one who constantly seeks out the meaning of my own life and it can be torture to never find the answer and always yearn to do so. I have often thought if I had some tragedy occur, such as getting a fatal illness, at least I'd have something to be passionate about and through which I could help others. But of course, I don't really want that! I just want the end result of it. I have tried the envisioning method as I have the "if I won the lottery" method and it has yet to result in an answer.

Imagining success is one piece of a puzzle that is unique to all of us. Another piece is your approach in my opinion. That is, taking it one step at a time and just starting something. Writing every day is a great way to explore and practice, until before you know it, something will materialize. I am getting ready to start that myself. Thanks for the inspiration. -X